Invaluable Parenting Skills Learned From The Royal Family

Last night I watched a documentary titled, “Born to Royalty.” I don’t know why, but the royal family of Britain has always fascinated me. I absolutely loved Lady Diana, and was devastated when I’d heard she was killed back in the 90’s. I felt as though I’d lost a friend. Strange, I know :-)!

This particular documentary (and no, I don’t spend every free moment I have reading up on or watching DVD’s of these privileged folks! Just to clarify :-)), was about parenting styles of the various generations of those who occupied and are yet to occupy the throne.


There were examples of strict and rigorous parenting, which begot descendants who later parented their own children in the same way. The consequences of this style of parenting were spoken of, including those that affected King George VI, whom you may have learned about in the excellent film, The King’s Speech. Then there was the shift into more modern parenting techniques adopted by Prince Charles and Lady Di, and now by Will and Kate.

I found it all fascinating… but there was one idea that was mentioned which blew me away. It was a “Duh!” moment. You know, one of those, “Why didn’t I think of that, it’s so obvious?!” moments you get once in a long while?

Princess Elizabeth’s parents, once they knew she would become queen, were said to have placed less emphasis on her academic studies, and far more training into other matters that would prepare her for her destined role of queen. Wow!

It instantly dawned on me as clear as God sees through the earth, that while academics are certainly important, shouldn’t you and I rather invest into our children to prepare them for their God-given, predestined, heavenly ordained roles in this life? Tweet that

Now, granted, we don’t know what form that exact role will take when each of our babes are born (it would have been helpful to have a little note delivered with the baby disclosing that information :-)). However, God’s Word does disclose several roles that our children will need to take, and therefore we as parents, do need to prepare them accordingly.

It is our duty, for example, to train our children for the royal roles of:

Being ambassadors for our Lord

  • Knowing how to articulate the Gospel to others
  • Maintaining a good example of Kingdom principles such as integrity, honesty, and generosity to others
  • Allowing one’s speech to always be seasoned with salt, building others up (1 Thessalonians 5:11), and being ready at every moment to give an account for the reason of our hope

Treating others with dignity and respect

One of the first lessons that is taught to young royals, is to take an interest in others. As long as they know how to be interested in others, the royals are considered to be well on their way to managing their positions! Biblically, this goes right in line with:

  • Considering others as more important than oneself
  • Being humble of heart
  • Displaying the fruit of the Spirit to those around us, and umpteen other commands in the Word that we could follow

Dying to Self

Ouch! This is a hard one to instill into our children, but a practice that every son and daughter of the King is required to live by. We are to teach our young ones to:

  • Sacrifice their own desires, wants, and preferences for the sake of others
  • Give generously, even at the expense of one’s own plans and prosperity
  • Make use of their God-given hours on this earth to serve and glorify God, rather than pursue selfish means to selfish ends. To seek His face daily and utilize every day to further the Kingdom of God; grow in His grace, the knowledge of His Word, and the love for others

 Just imagine if you would invest more time, effort, money, and care into training your children for these Royal roles, rather than in more temporal and futile matters.


Again, I am not saying that academics are not in order, or even necessary. But I for one intend to devote more of my resources as a mom in preparing my beautiful five children for the ministry of God’s work on this planet.

And may the utterances of God encourage us in these words:

And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.

Galatians 6:9

Where is your focus spent in your children’s lives – more on academics or more on character training? Would love to hear your thoughts…

Posted in Character, Children, Motherhood, Parenting | 11 Comments

Help with Eating Disorders: A Personal Experience

It was 1988. I was 15 years old enjoying a summer camp in the country where I grew up, South Africa. Until one day when Nikki, a close friend of my sister’s, pulled me away from the lunch table saying that she wanted to show me something.


Unsure of what on earth could be revealed, we stopped outside the girl’s bathroom, where she whispered, “Listen.”

Half hiding, I listened intently only to hear the sounds of someone throwing up. Not one to find the sound easy to stomach, I turned away until I was far enough to say to Nikki, “Why did you bring me to listen to such a thing?” Nikki somberly replied, “Tehila, that is your sister you just heard. She does that three times a day, after every meal.” My world shattered into a thousand pieces, and I had no idea of how to approach the situation, let alone my 14 year old sister.

My sister’s Bulimia continued until she was well into her 20’s. Even though she tried to hide it quite cleverly, I caught her several times throughout the years, and each time, my heart sank as I stood by helplessly witnessing the unnatural path she had chosen to take.

The Irony of Eating Disorders

Can you spot the irony in the following dictionary definition of Bulimia:

A habitual disturbance in eating behavior mostly affecting young women of normal weight, characterized by frequent episodes of grossly excessive food intake followed by self-induced vomiting to avert weight gain.

I often ask myself how my sister, who was ‘of normal weight,’ reached the level of throwing up her food after every meal. And I’m reminded of the reality of one of the potential causes each time I am at a supermarket checkout. Being faced with umpteen magazine covers each sporting beautiful, thin (no… skinny) women, boasting tanned curves and unrealistic beauty that I personally in my 41 years of living have not seen in a living woman. Do these women exist?

I have no doubt that the desire and pressure to emulate these nonsensical looks, is one of the driving forces behind Bulimia and other eating disorders. It hit close to home for me…

The Reasons for Eating Disorders

The fact that my father literally despised my mother, due to her being overweight for many years of our childhood, was definitely added to the mix. He made no secret of his disdain for her and blamed the extra kilograms for all the verbal and physical abuse that followed. With three daughters standing by watching and listening, no message could have been more destructive to absorb.

Back then, during all those many years that my sister struggled; in the midst of the years where her insides were so badly affected that she suffered internal bleeding and other health issues – back then, I did not know what lay ahead. I did not comprehend how to minister to her. I was ignorant of the only true solution that was open to her – the healing and identity that only God can restore.

Today, my sister is in Heaven. She enjoys a perfect heavenly body, with peace beyond understanding to go with it. At the age of 25 she was taken home to be with the Lord in a car crash.

The Futility of Eating Disorders

Does what her body looked like on this earth matter? Is this the quality that people remember about her? No. What those who knew her think of when they recall my sister Galia, is her love for the Lord, her unique sense of humour, her incomparable integrity, her impeccable sense of justice, her overwhelming kindness to those less fortunate than herself, and her faithful devotion to her friends and family, among other unforgettable traits.

I want you to know, my friend, that the attributes that will be remembered about you are the only ones worth investing in, working on, and praying about.  Tweet that

Your physical body is wasting away, but it is your inner person that is being renewed day by day (2 Corinthians 4:16).

I challenge you – take care of your body – for it is the temple of the Living God which dwells within you. But more importantly, take care of the treasures and character qualities that will last an eternity, and that will bring the most glory to your King! And you will hear – “Well done, good and faithful servant.”

How has our culture’s obsession with external appearance affected you? What can you begin doing today to invest in your inner beauty?

Photo credit: androidny via photopin cc

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Posted in Beauty, Eternity, Motherhood, overcoming, Parenting, Scripture, sin, Truth, Womanhood | 6 Comments

Get Organised in 2015 – Homemaker’s Daily Planner Giveaway!

How does the thought of being organised in every area of your life during 2015 sound to you?


It’s not everyday that I, as a homemaker, come across a tool so helpful and so practical, that I literally can hardly wait to share it with you!

I have been using Sue Hooley’s Daily Planner for the better part of 2014, and I honestly can’t ever see myself living without one of these again.

First of all, the layout and pictures are so beautiful and feminine, filled with encouraging quotes, and a verse from the book of Proverbs to ponder on for every week. Such a precious touch!

Beautiful Characteristics of the 2015 Daily Planner

The planner is divided beautifully into a number of handy sections, each having a stick-out tab of its own so they can be easily turned to.

The first section is a yearly calendar – with an extra page to write in annual events to remember.

The monthly section lays out each month in full form, so that you can easily glance at what will be happening over the next several months. I always joke that with each baby I lose 25% of my memory, and since I’m expecting my 5th, you can do the math and imagine how often I’ve referred back to this tangible reminder of what’s coming up! :-)


The weekly section is the one that you will use most often. Each week starts out with a ‘Tasks for this week” space, which you can use to jot down tasks that need to be done such as phone calls, appointments to schedule, etc. This space is usually filled out fast as I empty out my brain and see the things that would have otherwise cluttered my thoughts, in black on white on the page. A lifesaver!

The weekly section also lays out plenty of room to write down everything that is happening each day, and even includes place to write your planned menu!


Next are the Tasks list pages which are untitled, allowing you the freedom to create monthly, bi-monthly or seasonal lists.


The Projects section are for occasions that need more space for writing. If you are planning a party or a family gathering, for example, you will be able to keep that information in your planner and have it handy for quick reference. Super helpful!

dailyplanner projects

There is a section for phone numbers and addresses needed temporarily, to save the time of looking up the phone number again.


And last but certainly not least, the empty shopping lists space at the end of the planner enable you to simply tear them out on the perforated lines as you run into town to do your groceries.


With a myriad of extras to make this planner even more user-friendly, this will likely be the best planner you have had so far…

Get Organised in 2015 – Homemaker’s Daily Planner Giveaway!

Sue Hooley, the genius developer of this planner, couldn’t have put it better when she says, “It will be a friend that helps you remember and you will be rewarded with a feeling of satisfaction when even the simplest jobs have been completed.” I have found her words to ring true!

I am delighted to be offering one of Women Abiding’s beloved readers the chance to win one of these invaluable Daily Planners for 2015!

Simply pop in your email below and you’ll receive 10 entries into the draw PLUS a FREE eBook for Moms as a bonus gift to you!


a Rafflecopter giveaway

Purchase as a gift for yourself and a friend :-)



Posted in Giveaways | 8 Comments