4 Truths to Dwell On When You Fear Tragedy

This is a difficult post for me to write. God is in the midst of working in my life in an area that has caused me great anxiety over the years. Losing my children to death. Let me back up a little and give you some background of why this has been an inner heart fear of mine since our first child was born 18 years ago. During our first year of marriage, I endured tragedy. Both my mother and sister (who was heavily pregnant at the time) were killed instantly in a car accident.

Over the course of the nine years following that event, I struggled to make sense of what had happened, of God’s sovereignty, and whether I can trust Him (or not?). All the while my expectation of the next tragic event happening lingered like a wild animal waiting to pounce. In my mind, when I didn’t expect something bad to happen, it did – so if I do expect it will happen, it won’t. Pretty superstitious, But my fears were based on echoes from my post-traumatic stress, not on Truth.

Thankfully, after nine long years I had a major breakthrough in dealing with my loss which you can read about in this series I wrote on grief:

Part 1 – My Story and Tools To Help You Overcome Grief

Part 2 – How To Recognize God In All Circumstances

Part 3 – Can You Really Trust God?

Part 4 – Dealing With Grief: A Practical and Powerful Tool!

If you can relate to my struggle in any way, I would like to share with you 4 Truths to Dwell On When You Fear Tragedy. These are hot off the press as I am in the process of internalizing them myself, so when I write “you,” I’m preaching to myself as well.

1. Dwelling On What Could Happen

Dwelling on what could happen is not the right way to prepare for every eventuality. In His infinite wisdom God does not reveal what He has planned for our lives to us. But in incredible ways, He prepares us for what He knows is to come. The right way to live is not to meditate on all the worst possible outcomes that may (or may not) occur. It is to foster your walk with Him as you grow in the knowledge of His Word. As you dwell closely with Him, you will be fully ready for any circumstance, knowing that His will be done according to His good, gracious, and righteous character.

Expecting tragedy only invokes fear in you, it doesn’t actually protect you or your loved ones in any way.

So rather than dwell on what tragedy could happen, pray to be so strong in the Lord, that in the unlikely event that something will happen, you will embrace it as from God’s hand in trust, faith, and even gratitude.

But as for me, I shall walk in my integrity; redeem me, and be gracious to me.

Psalm 26:11

2. Dwelling On What You Think

What you think about, or don’t think about, doesn’t actually affect the reality of what will happen.

You can’t change the will of God which was determined before time began. Nor can you by worrying, overthinking, or fearing alter the circumstances that are His will to produce in your life. The only thing that that your thoughts affect are your own attitude and character. If you are thinking fearful, negative, and anxious thoughts, you will be a fearful, negative and anxious person. It’s as simple as that. One of my favourite verses in the Bible is Isaiah 26:3:

You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you.

I challenge you to have your mind committed to and focused on God—trusting and taking refuge in Him, with hope.

3. Dwelling on Mortality

It is a scriptural truth that it is inevitable that each of us will die. God’s Word lays it out plain as day when it tells us that there is a time to be born, and a time to die (Ecclesiastes 3:2) and we are bluntly told that:

… it is appointed for man to die once, and after that comes judgment…

Hebrews 9:27

100% of humans die. As difficult a thought as that may be to digest, it’s a reality that we all must face. Fearing death in any way is not actually something we are to do as believers:

 And do not fear those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather fear him who can destroy both soul and body in hell.

Matthew 10:28

For those who know Jesus as their saviour and king, their absence from the body will only mean their presence with the Lord

So we are always of good courage. We know that while we are at home in the body we are away from the Lord.

2 Corinthians 5:6

So, my friend, you will inevitably die, and so were each of your loved ones. It really is only a matter of timing. My greatest fear and source of anxiety has been the timing of any of my children’s death. The fact of the matter, for me, has been that I don’t want them to die before I do. I dread the potential pain of the unfathomable loss, and living out the rest of my days on earth without them. In this case, the most important question then becomes, are our children ready to die? Are they saved? Will they be in Heaven when their time comes? God has numbered each of our days. Your children and mine were not born one day too early, and they will not die one day beyond the number of days ordained for them by God.

My mother lived for 20,065 days.

My sister lived for 9435 days (in fact, the very day I am writing this would have been her 46^th birthday)

So teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom.

Psalm 90:12

Only God knows the exact number of days each of us has to live. Pray that whenever that number expires for your loved ones, whether during your lifetime or beyond, that they will be ready to meet their Maker, having been known and forgiven by Him so they may enter eternal life. (John 11:25)

And this is eternal life, that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom you have sent.

John 17:3

4. Dwelling on the Present

Having experienced great loss, over time I have allowed my past ordeal to taint my present thoughts about my future fate. But just because something happened to me, or to you, in the past, it makes no sense that it will in any way affect something similar happening to us in the future. None whatsoever. You may have endured some kind of trauma years ago, and have allowed it to pollute your thinking, stain your attitude, and distort your expectation of future events.

What I’m learning to do, and am hopeful that you will, too, is to put a period after that previous experience that caused you so much pain. It happened. You’re working through it. You’ve been taught greatly by the Lord as a result of it. Now put a period after it.

My mom and sister were killed in a car accident. Period. That was a traumatic event, and the experience lasted years, and will have an affect on me for the rest of my life. But that experience has no bearing on any other events that may, or may not, happen.

That was then. This is now.

The future doesn’t have to more of the past.

But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 3:13-14

When you fear tragedy, dear one, God’s precious Word is right there; to guide, to encourage, and to spur you on. He is God. And He is Good. May He bless your heart, mind, body, and soul today as you dwell on Him and His eternal words.

Light dawns in the darkness for the upright; he is gracious, merciful, and righteous.

Psalm 112:4

Have you endured hardship or tragedy that affects your perspective of the future? Which of the above truths did you find most helpful? Please leave me a comment 🙂

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