A Priceless Opportunity You Can Miss As A Christian Woman

Can you relate to this scene?

Grace (Younger Woman): Hi Annabel! It’s wonderful to see you again. Thank you so  much for dropping by for a visit!

Annabel (Older Woman): I’ve been thinking about you and wanted to see how you’re doing.

Grace: Well, actually, I’ve really been struggling with a number of issues in my life…

Annabel: Well, I’d love to hear about them if you’d like to share… I must just tell you that I’ve got a new grandson… would you like to see photos?

Grace: Sure…

Annabel: Isn’t he adorable? I went to see him last week, and I couldn’t believe how cute he is. He has just turned 6 months old, and has a new tooth coming through! Oh, Max and I have started renovating our kitchen.

Grace: Oh wow!

Annabel: We’re going to have it in neutral colours, not like the original one! By the way, Max’s cousin just had back surgery and is in so much pain – the poor guy. He’ll be in hospital for at least three weeks and then will need a carer when he returns home, but his son and daughter in law live right down the street so will be coming in to check on him regularly.

Grace: That’s kind.

Annabel: Oh, that reminds me, my grandmother used to care for an elderly man down her street after my grandfather died. He had pretty bad arthritis and needed help around the house, so she used to go over there to help with some cooking and light household chores. And then she landed up marrying him! He had four children of his own, so she used to ……………………………….

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45 minutes later….

Annabel: Goodness look at the time, I must rush off, I need to do some grocery Grace: Thank you for coming. Have a lovely evening…

Grace: Thank you, it sure was great to see you!


If you had the patience to read through that little fictional story, you will have a good picture of my observations of many older women whom have crossed my path over the past few years.

Did you notice that the younger woman in this scenario, Grace, was honest enough to confess that she has an array of heartfelt struggles going on in her life? She needed to talk to someone. She needed an older woman to bounce things off of, one that could impart her wisdom, her experience, and her prayers. Grace must have thanked God as she opened the door to Anabel, “Lord, you’ve brought me an older woman who can listen and help me in the midst of my trials!”

Yet 45 minutes later, as Annabel left, Grace was nowhere nearer exposing the aches of her heart to anyone and void of wise counsel. She was still stuck back at square one!

Annabel missed a golden opportunity to reach out, to listen, to extend knowledge and understanding accumulated over decades of life experience.

Consider this alternative scenario:

Grace (Younger Woman): Hi Annabel! It’s wonderful to see you again. Thank you so much for dropping by for a visit!

Annabel (Older Woman): I’ve been thinking about you and wanted to see how you’re doing.

Grace: Well, actually, I’ve really been struggling with a number of issues in my life…

Annabel: Well, I’d love to hear about them if you’d like to share… start at the beginning. I’m here to help! I care about you, and if the Lord can use me in any way to encourage you today, I’ll be delighted

Grace: That is such a relief, Annabel. I honestly feel better already. Well, for starters, Bobby got a job offer which would require us to move to a town three hours away……………………………

[Grace proceeds to share freely about several parenting issues that she is concerned about, a marital struggle, and some financial concerns she has. Annabel responds to each one giving her invaluable, practical advice drawn from years of marriage, bringing up her own children, and other experiences.]

45 minutes later….

Annabel: I need to rush off, I’m afraid, but can I pray for you before I do?

Grace: I’d love nothing more, thank you!

[Annabel prays sincerely for Grace, and promises to check in on her by phone within the next few days to see how she’s faring.]

With tears of gratitude filling her eyes, Grace parts with this Godly older woman, feeling renewed, relieved, and ready to face the struggles that burdened her so greatly only minutes before.

Are You An “Older Woman?”

You see, an older woman is not only someone who has grey hair or has reached a certain age. You qualify as being an older woman if you have been through the stage that another is just going through now. I am 43 years old, and have a woman aged 32 that I am encouraging on a regular basis. I’m not old enough to be her mother, but I’ve been through having little children, and I’ve been through the first years of marriage that she’s going through, etc. So to her, I’m an “older woman.”

The truth is that at any given time, each of us is both an “older woman” and a “younger woman.” There will always be those who are further along than we are, and those whom we have already passed on the way and are behind us…

My friend, if you are “older woman”, you can invest your time, expertise, and support to another, simply because you have walked further down the road of life than she has. You have the blessing and privilege of listening, showing great care, and encouraging.

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You have your ministry cut out for you by simply being willing to open your heart and life to another who is experiencing day to day life, with all of its joys and highs, but also hardships and trials.

In fact, I’ll go as far as to say that as a woman, God has placed within you a natural desire to pass on your knowledge and experience to others who are younger than you are. It’s His way…

One generation shall commend your works to another, and shall declare your mighty acts.

Psalm 145:4

What The “Younger Woman” Needs

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Younger women need support.

They need reassurance.

They need faith-boosting reminders that they are valuable, and that God is using them greatly in their families and communities.

They need a shoulder to cry on.

They need practical tips and advice.

They need loving correction.

They need refreshment.

They need perspective that what they are going through will pass, and that they’re enduring a short season in light of the scope and length of their lives.

They need prayer.

They need so much of what an older woman can generously give.

Don’t rob them of these. Don’t rob yourself of the blessing of being available to be involved in their lives.

Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children…

Titus 2:3-4

A Note To The “Younger Woman”

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If you are a “younger woman”, please understand that I realise that the number of older women who are willing to take the initiative and make the plunge into a meaningful relationship with you are sadly few and far between.

I encourage you to take the following steps:

1) Pray

Firstly pray and ask God to bring one into your life. Don’t just pray once… Keep praying until He faithfully answers and provides one. Not every older woman is right for you. You want a match made in Heaven 🙂.

2) Take Initiative

As the Lord leads, take the initiative to reach out to an older woman that may be able to be a listening ear and a support to you. Don’t be shy. Befriend such a woman whom you can admire, look up to, and learn from.

3) Humble Yourself

Super important is to humble yourself in opening your heart to her, in entrusting to her areas of your life that you may even be ashamed of. A special connection like that with an older woman, is an invaluable gift that you will treasure in this lifetime, and for all eternity.

I know it’s not culturally acceptable in our Western World to be so vulnerable. The walls, the defenses, the pride involved can keep any younger woman from letting down those guards. But it’s so worth it. So worth it!

Worth mentioning as part of humbling yourself, is be open to putting into practice the advice an “older woman”gives you. Of course way it up by Scripture first, and make sure your husband is on board with it, but do consider the experienced counsel of one that God brings into your life.


We often gravitate to those in our own age bracket and stage, but as someone who has been privileged of having an older woman in my life for many years, but who doesn’t have one locally now, I can vouch for the incredible difference it makes and the tremendous blessing it is!

May our great and merciful God grant both older women and younger the treasure of this ordained connection.

 

Are you an older woman or a younger one? Please share an encouraging experience of being in the biblical relationship of older/younger women.

 

 

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Tehila is an Israeli, God-loving, husband-serving, child-nurturing mom of five sweet little ones whom she homeschools. She resides in beautiful New Zealand from where she blogs at Women Abiding – Encouraging women to abide in God and His Word.
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About womenabiding

Tehila is an Israeli, God-loving, husband-serving, child-nurturing mom of five sweet little ones whom she homeschools. She resides in beautiful New Zealand from where she blogs at Women Abiding – Encouraging women to abide in God and His Word.
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48 Responses to A Priceless Opportunity You Can Miss As A Christian Woman

  1. Melinda Wood says:

    Tehila, my church just had an “older” ladies gather for those 45-older this past Sunday night. I am 45 therefore I am in that group. Strange for me because I’ve always considered myself too young to offer wise counsel. So your comment about how we are both older and younger at the same time…wow. That is truly amazing truth. Anywho, we were reminded of how we are to help the younger women and to be like God when doing so. Your post is a second witness in my life in as many days so I’m thinking God must be getting me ready to help someone younger. Thank you for following the inspiration and anointing of God. I love you dearly!

    • womenabiding says:

      That is super amazing, Melinda, my darling friend!!! When God brings something up in my life over a day or two, I know it’s Him indeed trying to get my attention! You will make like the BEST older woman! I’m 43, do you think you can “older woman” me? LOL 🙂 I love you, too sweet beloved! xoxoxoxox

  2. Johanna says:

    You hit that nail on the head. I don’t see myself as and “older woman” I’m 21. but I know that these opportunities could still pop up anytime with someone younger or even a “younger in their faith” christian. Discipleship/encouraging/strengthening relationships, like the one that could bloom between Grace and Annabel, between Christian women are so important and yet so frequently over looked.
    I pray that I never miss or overlook these opportunities.

  3. Tehila, thank you so much for this! I have a “younger woman” God has graciously led me into the opportunity to encourage and, I pray, minister to, so your wise post was PERFECT! As a major talker myself, I needed the reminder to, essentially, “shut up and listen, already!” So glad I found you this morning at ##Alittlebitofeverything! 🙂

    • womenabiding says:

      You’re so wonderfully humble, Elizabeth! And I looooove that you’re an older woman to someone! I believe beyond a shadow of a doubt that you’re a great, great blessing to one another! Praising God for you! xoxo

  4. Jeanne says:

    How inspiring. I have been trying to start a mentoring ministry at church for a couple of years now with no success. I now plan to step back and pray for a younger women to mentor to be put in my path.

    • womenabiding says:

      Thank you so much for your comment, Jeanne! I have often found in my own life that things I’ve tried to start that haven’t been successful is God’s way of telling me He has something different for me to invest in and pursue… He may be telling you the same thing… In any case, it’s wonderful that you’re humble and seeking Him for a younger woman… What an asset you’ll be her!!! Rooting for you! xoxo

  5. Brandi Raae says:

    Great post! I’m 40 and am in the raising-older-kids stage of life. My husband and I started going to a new church about 6 months ago, and I’d love the opportunity to meet younger women who need a listening ear. 🙂

    • womenabiding says:

      Thank you for sharing, Brandi! Sounds as though you have a beautiful heart for others, and that some blessed younger woman out there will benefit greatly from your experience, wisdom and faith… May the Lord bring one/some into your life in His timing… I know you’ll bring much joy to those He brings xoxoxo

  6. Ugochi says:

    This so good. Mentoring younger women is a command from God (Titus 2:4), but many times we take it lightly. I am only 40, I have a mentor myself and I have had the privilege to mentor some younger women who like you said, have passed through some of the stages I have in life.
    One of such women wrote recently, how she had learnt how to manage her babies from the times she spent with me and how grateful she was, it warmed my heart a lot…
    It is a rare privilege we all should participate in, and it is such a blessing.

    • womenabiding says:

      Thank you for your comment, Ugochi! It’s so wonderful that you are actually living out the model of Titus 2 so beautifully! I’m so impressed! I also find that in mentoring younger women, and for me too, practical advice is a huge part of it! Well said! Truly appreciate your input here, beloved one! xoxo

  7. Brenda says:

    It’s so true that we’re both, the older and the younger women…at the same time. I’m 45 and in our last city, I was the oldest female in our life group. I hope that I was able to be the next generation voice that they needed, at least in part. I have a couple of older ladies who speak into my life, but not on any type of regular basis. I’m sure you’re younger-lady is so blessed by you. — Lovely post, Tehila, thanks for sharing with #ChasingCommunity today. 🙂 ((hug))

    • womenabiding says:

      Brenda! I’m sure you’ve been an incredible gift and blessing to all those younger women! Sounds as though you had your ministry handed to you on a platter 🙂 Thank you for your beautiful, kind words. So much appreciate your love… xoxo

  8. Hi! What wonderful wisdom for women both young and old! I am your neighbor at #ChasingCommunity today, and so glad I was able to drop by today! Blessings, Misty

  9. Tehila, you’ve made such an important point here. One of my goals coming into this new year is to be more intentional in this very thing. And as God brings new daughters-in-law into my family, He is handing me the opportunity!

    • womenabiding says:

      I loooooove that you are seeing the addition of daughters-in-law as an opportunity to invest into their lives and be the “older woman…” It just shows that we often don’t have to look very far as God places the field right in front of us! Truly enjoy your input here at Women Abiding, Michele! xoxoxoxo

  10. KellyRBaker says:

    Wonderful post! We need to see more of this in the church. I’m turning 40 this month. I try to keep at least one woman mentoring me (no matter her age), and keep at least one woman I’m mentoring (no matter her age). Over the last few years I have been mentoring women both older and younger than me. Age doesn’t matter, the spiritual maturity does, right? It’s just a matter of being able to *receive* from someone who is younger in age than you.

    • womenabiding says:

      You’re amazing, Kelly! You are living by such a mature and biblical model! I love your attitude and perspective! I’m sure you’re being so blessed by having an “older woman” in your life, and it’s so precious the way you’re passing that on to someone else, too… You’ve encouraged my heart today! xoxo

  11. This is such a lovely post and a great reminder for us “older women”. I am always striving to share my experiences and the lessons I have learned along the way. If they can help someone else have an easier time of it, then I feel blessed to be able to share. Thank you for the reminder!

    Hopping over from Make My Saturday Sweet.

    Shelbee
    http://www.shelbeeontheedge.com

  12. Bella says:

    I’m still only young by many people’s standards – I just got married last year. But only a few weeks ago I heard the joyous news that my sister-in-law got engaged! So now I have the privilege of the ‘older woman’ role, in encouraging her and helping her through engagement and wedding planning, and one day soon encouraging her in her role as a wife. I pray that God gives me wisdom for this task.

    • womenabiding says:

      I’m so excited by your comment, Bella! It makes me think about my own children who are still young, but how one day they will each have young sister’s in law to mentor… Such a thrilling thought! You’ve blessed my socks off today, girlfriend!!! xoxo

  13. Liz says:

    Great practical advise. I realized a few years ago I was slipping into the “older than most of the people I typically interact with” bracket. At first I was a little taken aback. Now that I’m settling in to it, I am enthralled. It has given me such a boost in confidence to see all the God has taught me along the way. And somehow He trusts me enough to share it with His children of a slightly younger age! Blessings!

    • womenabiding says:

      That’s such a great way of looking at things, Liz! I love your perspective… and it’s so wonderful the way God takes some negative thought pattern, and turns it around for His glory! Praising God for His work in your life! xoxo

  14. Pen says:

    I am not sure i am convinced that age comes into it. If a friend or acquaintance starts to open up and clearly wants to talk about various issues in their life then we should do them the common courtesy of listening and being that friendly ear. You don’t have to be the ‘older’ woman to do that, you just have to be a little less self-centred and selfish. Pen x #sharethejoylinky

    • womenabiding says:

      Thanks for your input here, friend… I completely agree, and God uses us in the lives of others, regardless of age, when we are available to His leading… The Bible does talk about older women investing in younger women in a more mentoring type of role, and there’s a place for that, too… Of course the older you are, it’s often the case that you have more wisdom and experience, but there are exceptions to the rule, I understand that. The main thing is that if there are those who are younger or at a different stage (one we’ve already gone through), it will be a blessing to reach out to them and help them along the path that we’ve already treaded…. Really appreciate your comment! xoxo

  15. Lizzie Roles says:

    This is wonderful advice! Just last night I prayed for our younger babysitter who is going through a rough few weeks. Thank you for your encouragement that I did the right thing by listening and praying for her. If you could add the Share the Joy badge to each post linked up that would be awesome! Lizzie #sharethejoy

  16. Kate says:

    Thanks for sharing some important and thought provoking messages

  17. This post is so needful, Tehila! I never had the loving mentor of an older woman to guide and help me.
    We all need each other (in every stage of life), but those who have gone through the difficulties of life before us have a unique ability to give us of their knowledge and wisdom. I hope to be that woman for the lonesome, hurting, confused younger woman that I was not that long ago.
    Thank you for sharing your wisdom, my friend.💜
    Visiting from #GraceandTruth link up.

    • womenabiding says:

      I so much agree with you, my Gleniece friend! I just know and utterly believe that you will be an absolutely wonderful “older” woman! You have so much to give, and I’ve loved getting to know you in this place and it’ll be such a blessing for others, too, to do the same! God bless you, beautiful lady! xoxo

  18. Nicole says:

    I find myself on both sides depending on different situations in life. Good women, young and old, have taught me many things and those relationships are important to me. Stopping by from the #HomeMattersParty

    • womenabiding says:

      That’s wonderful to hear, Nicole. It’s precious that you’ve been humble enough to receive instruction and mentorship from both older and younger women xoxo

  19. Jann Olson says:

    It’s so important to have a listening ear! That’s the problem with the world today, there’s too many concerned with their own circumstances more than others. Thanks for sharing with SYC.
    hugs,
    Jann

    • womenabiding says:

      You’ve really hit the nail on the head, Jann! If we’re more outward focused, we will see the many women whom we can serve and mentor… thank you so much for your insight! xoxo

  20. Sue says:

    So glad to read this because I feel I am the older women and younger women in certain circumstances. I’m a mama of three boys who need the encouragement from older women, but I am also a role model for many young women in the church. Thank you for pointing out the verses and needs of these two types of women. #heartencouragment

  21. nylse says:

    I like what you said about being younger and older women at the same time – this is so true.

    I have had the benefit of the friendships and mentoring that older women brought into my life and I have been blessed to mentor younger women. As my daughter is getting married this year I have been burdened to help younger women again. There’s always need for mentorship and friendship from older women and as I’ve been blessed I would like to pass this on to the younger.

    Stopping by from #momentsofhope linkup.

  22. Katarina says:

    Such a great post! There is so much truth in all of this. As one of the “younger women”, I definitely think we have a tenancy to believe that we know everything, but we really don’t. Learning to seek out, and accept advice from the women who have already walked the same path that we are, is so beneficial.

  23. Hannah says:

    It’s so true that we can learn so much from different age groups than our own.

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