23 Extraordinary Life Skills to Pass on to Your Children
As adults, you and I accumulate experience that can be so helpful and useful to the children and grandchildren the Lord has been gracious to grant us. What a privilege it is to be able to hand over these gems to our loved ones so that they can enjoy a head start in life. By passing on some basic tools that we have learned (often the hard way), they can focus their time and energy on the calling that God has placed on their lives, while functioning in the practical ways we’ve entrusted to them.
While all of life is lived within the “spiritual,” as God is in all, through all, and over all, to make the skills easier to remember, I’ve divided this continued list of 23 Extraordinary Life Skills To Pass on to Your Children into three “S” categories; Spiritual, Social, and Sensible:
Spiritual
1. It’s okay to cry
Sadly in our society crying is often viewed as weakness and mental instability, but how far this is from the truth. God is the very one who created this physical and emotional outlet when our hearts are burdened, hurt, and overwhelmed. There are a whopping 611 verses that deal with variations of the word “cry” in the Bible! Great men of old, prophets, chosen people, the weak and the strong – have all cried, wept, and wailed before the Lord! It’s okay to cry, my friend.
2. Always look at things from an eternal perspective
The life you are living is temporary. One thing every human being has in common is that they will one day die. We dare not live for this life alone. Each and every experience we have should be viewed in light of eternity. So, practically speaking, when your daughter drops the china vase that your great grandmother left you in her will, in light of eternity, it honestly doesn’t matter. It will seem like dirt once you cross over to your Heavenly home. Or if you experience the heartache of a miscarriage, that too is looked at from an eternal lens – you will see your sweet baby again!
What a joy it should be to pray as Jonathan Edwards did, “Lord, stamp eternity on my eyeballs!” Click To TweetIn keeping with this, never get upset about anything that breaks. You came into the world with nothing, and will leave with nothing, so place minimal value to material objects.
3. Give glory to God in everything
In life, we will be faced with a choice at every turn; to take the easy route or the route that would glorify the Lord. Living a lifestyle where we are intentional about giving God glory is almost always more difficult than the alternative, but oh what joy it brings both to our hearts and to the heart of our Father!
4. Humble yourself and place the responsibility on yourself
When confronting either your husband, a relative, or friend, never use words that can come across as accusatory. Rather use, “I feel.”
Notice the difference between these two ways of saying things:
“You spoke badly about me behind me back!”
“I felt rejected when I found out you spoke badly about me behind my back”
When you use, “I feel,” it replaces any defensiveness that the person you’re talking to may experience and shifts the mood of the conversation to one of reconciliation. Always humble yourself in the way you speak, especially during confrontational conversations, and place the responsibility on yourself, for the sake of peace.
5. Live in the present
When my daughter was about 15 years old, I remember her telling me “I’m either living in the past, in the future, or in the clouds.” That was so perceptive of her, and would probably describe the large majority of people on the earth!
Someone once said it well, “Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift.” Click To TweetWe must naturally plan the coming days and weeks, and of course the past has contributed to who we are today, but the discipline of living in the present is one that needs to be cultivated. To dwell where God has placed me in the here and now, acknowledging His work in my life this very day, leads to unspeakable contentment and a heart of gratitude.
6. When you find yourself sick in bed use the time well
It is God who is allowing the break in your busy life, and while you’re unwell, you can still make a little plan of how to use your time wisely. Some activities I’ve done while I’ve been out of commission have been Bible reading/study, reading an uplifting book, being productive on the computer, writing cards to people, etc. Each and every day of your life has a purpose and has been ordained before time began. Even while we’re sick, we can seek not to waste the time, but use it to glorify God!
7. It’s okay to change your mind
We are finite beings who can’t predict the future, and who make mistakes. If you’ve committed to something but upon further thought and prayer have realized that you were hasty in your promise, it’s okay to change your mind! Of course you want to be a trustworthy person, and keep your word, but if unforeseen circumstances arise, or if you are convicted of having overcommitted, rather change your mind than do the task with a heavy heart wishing you weren’t doing it at all.
8. Live a life of showing appreciation to others
Express your appreciation to God (1 Thessalonians 5:18), pour on the appreciation to your family, to your friends, to your online community, to the lady at the post office, to the librarian, to the stranger who picks up your wallet when you drop it, etc. Here are 4 Things You Can Do To Make Others Feel Appreciated.
9. The way in which you start your day, is most likely the way you’ll continue it.
If you eat junk food first thing in the morning, it will be hard to eat a salad later. If you start your day being unproductive; surfing the net, or playing computer games while you procrastinate doing what you need to get done, it will be super hard to start working after that. Your brain has tasted laziness and inefficiency and will most likely take that route for the rest of the day. So, rather start your day with healthy and productive habits, so you can live each day to its fullest for the Lord! “So, whether you eator drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.” (1 Corinthians 10:31)
Social
1. When paying someone a visit rather leave too soon than too late
It’s healthy for the friendship, to leave while your hosts would still like more of you, rather than overstaying your welcome.
2. Use people’s names as often as you can
A person’s name is a very personal part of them, and when you use it regularly, it sends a message of love, respect, and care.
3. When you visit someone…
Always send a thank you email/text within a few hours after you’ve left to express your appreciation.
4. After you have had guests over…
Send them an email/text a few hours after they’ve left to let them know what a blessing it was to share their company and how glad you are that they were able to visit. Similarly, if you’ve spent special time with someone, sending a little note of encouragement afterwards is always a nice touch.
5. Always return things in better condition than you received them
If, for example, you borrow a book that is slightly falling apart, consider covering it with plastic to keep it in shape. Or if you’ve been given a meal in a dish that could use a scrub, return it sparkling. Show your love and care by returning items in better condition than when you received them.
6. When someone invites you to a birthday party or any special occasion…
If you are unable to attend, make sure to get a gift to them at a later date.
7. When you’re feeling down or depressed…
Think of three people that you can reach out to and encourage – then do it! A sure remedy…
Sensible
1. Unsubscribe from emails ruthlessly
(Unless it’s an email from Women Abiding) 🙂 As soon as you see an email that bothers you, causes you to feel guilty, overwhelmed, or inadequate, unfollow the site. Also, if you have been receiving emails from a blog or company and haven’t opened them over the past few weeks – unsubscribe! You won’t miss them and will enjoy the relief of not having the clutter in your Inbox.
2. Plan for out of the ordinary events well ahead of time
If you are due to go on vacation in three weeks, break all your need to do into smaller tasks and tackle those over the days leading up to your going away. If you’ve invited friends over for dinner on Friday evening, start with cleaning the house bit by bit a few days in advance, so that things aren’t frantic on the day. Think ahead and space out what you need to do well in advance.
3. Consider choosing passwords that remind you of the Lord
For example “God-is-good,” “faithful-is-he,” “how-great-though-art,” etc. It’s amazing how many times a day we have to type in our passwords, and astounding how encouraging a reminder it can be to type in a short God-glorifying phrase. Try it! 🙂
4. Every time you leave a room in your home…
Sneak a quick look around and take something with you that will make the room look tidier and better than when you entered. So, for example, if I’m heading to the bedroom area of our house, as I leave the living room, I’ll grab one of the children’s sweaters and a book that belongs in their room and drop it off as I go past. Those are two less extra items that now clutter the lounge. If you do that several times a day, your rooms will look a lot neater.
5. Eliminate as many decisions as you can from your life
In our busy lives, there are so many decisions that need to be made daily, and often hourly. Put some decisions in place that you won’t have to make every time the activity comes around. You may decide that every week you are going to church. So when you get to Sunday, it’s not a decision you have to make afresh. No matter how you feel, or who’s preaching, you’ve already made the blanket decision that you will go to the meeting every Sunday, come rain or shine.
Or you may decide on one thing you are going to focus on in your free time this month. Consequently, when you have a free hour, you don’t have to make a decision about what to do, since you’ve already decided that ahead of time.
4. When returning from a time away from home…
Unpack within 24 hours of getting back from a trip. Fishing daily items you need out of a suitcase ten days after you’ve been back, is messy and certainly no fun!
5. Always be on the lookout for clothes…
Chances are so much higher that you’ll find something you just love by spotting it somewhere, than if you decide on a certain day that you’ll go clothes shopping. Plus you’ll be way more likely to come across great deals that you can take advantage of if you’re always on the lookout.
I could go on and on with little bits and pieces I’ve picked up over the 45 long years of my life, but I’ll leave it there for now, and may write more when I’ve accumulated another 23 life skills I wish my mother had taught me.
I’d like to challenge you to start a running list of your own with pearls of wisdom that you can pass on to your descendants, too!
Which one or two stood out to you from the above list that you could take into your own life. Do you have any wise life skills to add?
